ConfuseD :-/

The one word to describe me right now is “RUN OUT”. This is insane. I feel dead tired. And I can’t feel anything. I feel numb. If I did try to feel, I think I will drop dead. And as delicious as that sounds, everything is boring.


I just don't know what to do with myself, coz all i get to hear from door to door is "NO". This probably has become a habit now. I simply don't understand what's wrong with me. They ask me to wait for a month, n all I answer them is that "...i am running out of time..". When I came into this city, all I had with me was my confidence, now three months later, even confidence has vanished and all that I have with me is "HOPE". I have never felt so low on confidence and week.

I have completely lost my story, n all that I am afraid of is of  becoming "HISTORY". Looking Back, what I only regret is this thing, so called "OVERCONFIDENCE". I was always afraid of facing this world, from the point of what I am. Everybody in my world thinks that I am "HAPPY-GO-LUCKY" kind of a person. now I am afraid to be happy, coz every time I try to be happy, something bad always happen.  I am emotionally devastated now. What’s tough now is that, I can’t even complain about it. See, the rebel in me, doesn't like anything. What is more provocative is the  fact  this life, has supposedly thrived at a mere whim.


Some how, I have come to realize that it is alright to make mistakes and learn from them. But this will get challenging for sure.